Chanae cracked the shits and I'd never seen such a dramatic over-reaction as she (now hilariously) carried on, having an absolute meltdown, and then went and slept on his balcony at the front door "like a dog" until neighbouring Ferny put a blanket on her. A traditional hectic funny first night spent in the Pedge, it wouldn't happen any other way. When we woke bright and early, I was rough as hell, and still drunk. We all went home to my place where we all ate vegemite toast, and drank Gatorade before I was begrudgingly dragged from laying on the cool floor tiles (fireball hangovers are THAT bad) back to sublime. We all jumped in the lake in an attempt to shock the hangover out. Ferny just had some hammocks fitted down at the beach so me jodes and Chanae spent the entire day lazing our hangover off in the hammocks. A quick costume change at home, and it was back to sublime to enjoy the new special seafood menu for Easter. We called it an 'early night' where we left just before closing time, (a very rare occasion) and retired home for snuggles, and copious amounts of munchies in my bed.
Wednesday morning and I of course took Chanae to the infamous Paca, where we bought some food for the week and of course indulged with a bunch of new (second-hand) clothes. It was on this trip to the paca that I found Jodie a dressing gown. Not just any dressing gown. But, the Mit. It would complete the three of us with our sexy winter Nanna dressing gowns for when we are chilling at home... Or not. I wasn't scared to wear my kangasnuggy to the tienda or the banditos. Little did we know then how much light the Mit would bring to our lives. We came home from the market where I cooked up a storm, and the three amigas had aho for breakfast and went to sublime where we hang in the hammocks all day. We spent hours in the same position in stitches and tears of laughter to the point that I pulled a rib. We enjoyed a bottle of champagne because I always love me some champagne showers on days like these. Marcus and Ferny waited on us, delivering cocktails and pizza - Marcus con queso. Some time had passed and I went on a mission and decided to kidnap Ferny. We bought him into our lair of hammocks and he passed out. I wrote on his chest "todos gratis for life for Kassie Chanae and Jodie" and sent a photo into the staff chat. We then held him hostage for fireball shots which was a quick and easy exchange. But don't despair Alex, we know you're worth more. Funnily enough everyone had been "looking for him" for hours yet no one came and checked on the beach where the biggest ratbags in town were hiding out. However, in San Pedro "looking" simply equates to "wondering". We are a bunch of lazy folk, we won't deny it. In fact, we are proud of it. In the evening we got the delicious Alegre pie and watched a gig at sublime. We then alternated between there and that checking on Marcus and fernies pulses' because they had cooked themselves early and then passed out. We ground controlled the situation (and of course took novelty photos to their detriment). It's was a little rainy and we weren't vibing off the big city crowds in town that night, so we got munchies and went home to bed.
Thursday we went to a cafe for breakfast and did some errands followed by watching shameless episodes (the only show I follow and love) at my place with Marcus and Chanae. They both passed out beside me while I was glued to the computer screen with with bated breath. Later that night, waking up to an alarm at 9pm to go out (as you often do after an afternoon sleep), we met down at sublime to catch our pals. Max and Heidi were buzzing and next minute we had been roped into another aho adventure! There was meant to be an after party that night, but after the guest band that played, police were clearing people out and we all got split up. Me, Jodie and Chanae were back at mine topping up getting ourselves rightly done, and went on an adventure walking the streets in our novelty onesies with popcorn and m&ms looking at the starts while laying in the middle of the road. I think we forgot we were looking for our pals or an after party. Before sunrise I headed home to sleep while Chanae and Jodie ran riot in town and tried to steal kayaks.
We woke up on Friday afternoon and went to sublime for recovery Pizza. Me and Chanae stayed out and ate lots of aho, and then got super wobbly. I totally fucked myself up. The bar was packed and we started to help clean up for free drinks until I hit a wall and had to get out of there fast. I hate feeling out of control and with half a dozen vodka red bulls now added in the mix, I could feel myself loosing control so I was out! I went to go up to Marcus place which was the closest to sublime but I Couldn't get in (even though he told me where the key was... or gave me the key... I can't be sure because regardless, by the time I got there - I forgot) so I passed out in ferny's bed. Next thing I know I am woken up to him and Marcus shaking me to see if I was alive. We all had a laugh, but I barely was. I was trollied. I stumbled into Marcus bed until I could see and walk straight come early morning where he then walked me home. What a top pal. No man left behind. When I woke up at my place in the afternoon, I regrouped at sublime, ate delicious lunch at clover with Chanae and then we went to the Banditos, where everyone was painting signs of scrap wood and putting them up around the garden. This is where I wrote 'a good sign'. I wanted to stay in and enjoy pottering on my hangover, but I got roped into sublime where it was completely packed. We ended up having an after party at kitto's where we all got even more done. Me and Jodie sat in the hoopla hoop safe zone, until me and the girls went back to mine to watch blades of glory at 4am where we all eventually passed out.
On Sunday we went for dinner at the italian restaraunt as a surprise for Chris birthday. Following we headed into sublime where it was just me and Chanae. We were winging for each other, and she had been making eyes with a cutie so I went with her where we all met, and hung out by the fire. Who would have known then that the boy Chanae was chatting to, would become one of our bestest friends in guatemala. Luigi, my homie. At the end of the night I went to Ross' place with a few friends. We stayed on the rooftop drinking by candlelight. A couple of us went on an adventure to the other end of town trying to find an after party but ended up just smoking on the jetty before heading back to the roof. Here a surprising rooftop kiss would lead into what would become a buzz of a next couple of weeks, forging some new friendship dynamics and adventures outside of San Pedro.
It was now Monday and the day for the long awaited staff party at sublime. It was crazy dress so I went home, first to Chanae's room where we both had a cack. A floor below and Jodie and Paco were already dressed in outfits they found at the paca early that morning. Paco was wearing a cushioned bummed borat-style speed bicycle suspender pants and a Hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat. Today was going to be a good day. Jodie gave me an incredible long sleeved brightly coloured puffy vested 80's dress with bow tie and shoulder pads. We all finalised our finest outfits, Aaron rode me downtown on a motorbike where Chanae Jodie and paco followed on paco's bike. When we got there, the vibes were high. We arrived to an applause and roars of of laughter at our outfits. We hit the bar which was open (help-yo-self) and started to Party. The obligatory group photo on the bar got out of the way and we hit the party treats, and enjoyed an awesome lunch thanks to Diego including an incredible chocolate cake. It was all fun and games until Alex got thrown off the balcony (a fateful tradition which I would hope now stops) and ended up being taken straight to hospital. We were all were beside ourselves and closed up the bar and everyone straightened up. All lost and confused, most of us pals went back to the banditos where everyone ended up getting super high and just consoled each other and putting out good vibes for Ferny. Chanae went to Zoola and I stayed in a cuddle puddle, hanging with the pals and up to Aaron's room where things got weird when some awkward girl started sexy dancing ("but I'm wearing bathers so it's not sexy").
Tuesday morning I woke up and went to the to the markets for flowers for Ferny, and Rhi made a gift basket that we took down to kitto to pass on, and we got updates on his treatment. A few stitches and an abundance of bruising, he was going to make a full recovery. Well, you know, for Kevo! Tuesday night we had a family dinner of fish and chips at the banditos, Wednesday - not sure, after the events I lost track of some details but I'm sure we probably drank Quetzalteca and partied at my place for the afternoon and party the night away in sublime. Thursday was dress like a pirate day at sublime, I had to work and was so incredibly tired and hungover. When Chanae and I finished work, we went on a triple date with Jodie and the boys to the pub and got our traditional pie dinner! We headed back for a pre party at ours where we drank Quetzalteca and partied at sublime.
Friday, Chanae treated my hair for nits - devastated. They were going around town and it was my fateful luck that they discovered the jackpot with my long locks. We visited Lolita, got the wobbles and another big bottle of quetzalteca and had a party at my place. We had a killer fun night to alessi's killer DJ set at sublime DANANA NANANA NANANA NANANA NA, DANANANANANA OKAY!!!!!! I Bought a tonne of alcohol before the bar closed and went back to our place for an after party with all our new friends keeping it under wraps from the general public. Our roomie Aaron also bought a party crew back with people we didn't know, and we had (controversial) seperate parties - one upstairs and one downstairs. We stayed up all night partying, laughing, and breaking chairs - Alec! We starting putting the boys to bed as they were blaggered, and I stayed up laughing with the girls and talking with melly all night and morning. As I prepared to go to bed at 9.30 am, Kim woke up and so we grabbed a packet of chips and some beers and started all over again. Ross' parents were cooking a family roast for everyone so we got our shit together very slowly and the way wen to our friends place Luke's where we had an awesome roast and red wine. What a delicious family meal with our adopted parents, and then Home to bed for 13 hours sleep. Sunday, had my treated for nits again and went for a bbq at smoking joes for James last day, we bought MAS Quetzalteca and visited lolz on the way home and drank and had a small party at mine. Off to sublime for our last Sunday night. Andy played Chet faker on open mic which was brilliant. Nailed it Andy!
Monday we decided that we would go to Antigua on an adventure! We ate lunch at Zoola and had a small nap post food and then woke In time for dinner at Buddha bar for Ross parents last night. Straight back to bed. Tuesday woke up and finished packing for Antigua had brunch with friends and farewelled the sublime crew and left at 2pm. We got to Antigua around 6pm and before even getting off the shuttle, a friend saw and recognised me and I was tackled in the street! We popped into the hostel where my Ye olde San Pedro pals were working until luis and laura came to meet us, and take us out. I had to be the party pooper and canned the night due to some excruciating back pain. Luis took us to a friends place for the night which happened to be an incredible mansion. I was in agony, so I went straight to bed.
Wednesday we woke up to the lovely house during the day. How lucky we were! We drank a lovely blend of tea and Chanae massaged my bum cheeks! We had breakfast at rainbow cafe, and then I was convinced to get a needle in my bum for the back pain, which ended up being the best thing ever! We had luis' friends pick us up in their ute, and we went off for an adventure to hobbitinango. We enjoyed an incredible view of the surrounding volcanoes, and had some delicious snacks and beer. We drove back to Antigua and had a family dinner at a fried chicken restaurant - my favourite! We got changed and then headed out for the night. Starting at lucky rabbit where I was introduced to the delicious chewbacca shot that was topped with fried bacon! We then went to las vibras where Chanae got white girl wasted. We then had the pizza ordeal! Hahaha oh Felicia! It was before midnight and Luis drove us safely to Guatemala City. Here we stayed at his friends place, who again, would become some wonderful friends to us, and I love dearly! We were in a prime part of town (KFC, Burger King and McDonald's all surrounding) oh, and amazing views of the city. Thursday morning Kim left early, flying home to Denmark, and it was down to the three amigos! Me, Luigi, and Felicia! We woke for wake and bake with Andrea before she left for work, and we stayed in and watched Netflix and chilled!!!! With everywhere doing home delivery, we ordered a tonne of food and didn't need to leave the couch. We watched some great documentaries before we began drinking in the evening. That night we went to secret garden around midnight. Here, I had an epic run in with my friend melly from the lake, as well as two others! They were all so surprised to see me out of the lake! We came home at 4/5am in the morning where I stayed up with jp and allessi and had an alessi breakfast, and didn't have any sleep, just chilling and listening to tunes.
As Saturday got on, me and the boys rotated our way around the lounge room. From seats to floor and back to the seats... The house would slowly wake up and slowly congregate around in the lounge where we really eased into the evening for the pool party. We arrived at around 11pm where upon parking, Laura's car broke down. She parked it up and we hoped for the best; Tomorrows problem. There was a sweet set of DJs and an awesome set up. It was Freezing and far too cold for the pool. We stayed up dancing and chilling all night and then we moved across the road for a little bonfire just before sunrise. For sunrise it was alessi's set and all the tunes he plays we now know and love. He pumped 'Okay' where I busted out on the driveway, dancing to JP Andrea and Manual sitting by the pool - we just hit next level.... Again! I started drinking beer for breakfast. Next thing we know it's super hot so me and JP jumped through hoops into the pool and that's where we stayed for the next hour or two though it Didn't feel like long but we all got super red hot burnt. Chanae and I laid in our pool rings while JP waited on us, providing all the drinks and treats that we desired. I passed out for a little bit in a make shift bed made from pool chair covers made by JP before I Woke up and partied a little more. It wasn't until the evening when it fell darkand we all left. Laura's car broke down on the way home and so we waited an hour or so for a taxi to come and take us home. It felt like the longest time ever! I couldn't even nibble on the chicken nuggets Chanae bought me before passing out.
Waking up the next day after 11 hours sleep, I enjoyed my cold chicken nuggets for breakfast and watched Netflix before anyone woke up. Laura went out and cooked us pasta for lunch and we were complete couch potatoes for the entire day. We all fell asleep watching movies in the evening, a big recovery day!
Tuesday we woke up and got dropped at the mall where me and Chanae hung for the day. It had been months since I'd been to a shopping centre so it spun me out a little. We smashed some Chinese food and a McFlurry and shopped for gifts for our new friends who were so mind to let us stay with them. In the evening we decided to go bar hopping around the city. We stopped at a couple of bars and kidnapped JP early from work before we went to the final bar for the night, Mr fish. Here we were standing around having a dance and a drink when all of a sudden gunshots were fired directly across the road and everyone dropped to the floor; except me and Chanae. We stood there just looking at each other, trying to compute what was going on, before hitting the deck. No one was shot and no one was harmed. Police patrolled the street, constantly driving up and down and Laura decided it would be best if we left. We went to diegos place for an after party which turned into an all nighter of us listening to music between the lounge and the beat room. We all tried to have a little nap on the couch around midday which didn't last for very long before we scooted off home. It was a Wednesday and we arrived back in the afternoon where all I could stomach was fruit before heading to bed for a nap. I was pleasantly woken to have bucket bongs in the lounge room and a delicious family dinner cooked by our hosts and then netflix and chill before all passing out.
Thursday we woke up for wake and bake and watched Netflix. We went out like a tourist in the city and shopped at thrift stores like a boss picking up some great weed pants, t shirt, and a brand new pair of doc martens. On the way home we stopped at kfc where I had the best KFC in my life! It had been more months than I could count since I'd indulged in my filthy favourite! Followed, we Went home and lazed in our new clothes and then slowly got ready for the night. We smoked two huge blunts and got super super high from this super expensive kush that we bought. When we shared the third one, all sitting around dressed to go out, we decided to call it a night and can going out! We all snuggled into couch with a tonne of munchie food and watched horror movies (which I truly dislike and so I tried to ignore while trying to occupy myself with Facebook). When I toddled off to bed at some stage from falling asleep on the couch, I had trouble sleeping. I woke during the night with what I would find out was 'sleep paralysis' which scared the hell out of me!
Friday I woke up around 10am and went into the lounge room for Netflix as I waited for Chanae and luis to wake up. We ate breakfast while luis offered his ideas for the grand plan for the day. At 2pm one of luis friends picked us up in his pimp New FJ and drove us to Antigua. We just visited for the day where we enjoyed some spectacular Italian pizza at 7a Norte restaraunt - what an incredible restaraunt/bar. Me and Chanae went to the paca which was too expensive,so we just picked up a extra couple of things each, considering we were staying much longer than anticipated in the city. We got back to our city home in the evening and pre drank at the house before going to secret garden for an event at midnight. We stayed until close at 4.30am and went back home where we couldn't sleep. Me and Chanae stayed up in bed all day listening to old school music and having giggles before we had a truck load of KFC delivered. And then, we did the same thing all afternoon into the evening where we finally fell asleep at 10pm.
Sunday morning and we sadly packed our bags for Antigua. Andrea and Manuel had become our family and their home became our home. It was so sad to leave, but we were so lucky to be there for as long as we were. We ate lunch at lava in Antigua, which escalated quickly into a Sunday fun day with luis' friends. Me and Chanae kept popping out to window shop and book our shuttle and when we came back in the early evening, the boys were tanked! We walked into a grave site of wasted people and found it so funny how it escalated so much when we were out. We tried to catch up a little before we left and just got started before we went to the lucky rabbit. Here we ran into some friends where we were having a ball. We went VIP in the staff room and weren't sure how we should spend our last night. Chilling or partying.... As more of our friends stayed with us we didn't want to leave in the slightest, however we felt obligated to as we're staying at luis' friends place and he wanted to go home. When we got back there, me Chanae and Luis sat on the roof telling funny stories about the trouble we used to get up to until 2am. The three of us shared a pull out sofa in the lounge and snuggled until the fateful alarm sounded. We had the 7.45am shuttle back to San Pedro. Two weeks to the day, partying in the city and Antigua was the greatest time ever. We made soo many more wonderful friends, and a tonne of fun experiences up our sleeve. it was incredibly sad to leave. Considering I could never see the day I would leave San Pedro, now I was sad to go back. I felt like I was definitely ready to move on, after this first journey outside of the Pedge prove to be such a wicked one. We arrived back in the Pedge at midday. It was hot day and when we arrived we saw our crew with a very warm welcoming home. We witnessed Ferny's cat ceviche, give birth to three kittens and then went to fe for the night, where we watched fear and loathing in Las Vegas on the big outdoor cinema.
The next three days we just pottered about, settling back in temporarily and catching up with our pals. On 4/20 me and Chanae were getting ready for the celebration when our crew of max, Heidi and Ferny came over. Here we had Opium for breakfast and got all dressed up for sublime, where we hung in the corner all day smoking blunts and cuddling the new kittens. We ate heaps of food and then spent the afternoon at the banditos cuddling puppies and watching episodes of the office. We Continued to eat the world before heading home to sleep.
Thursday was a crazy day where Chanae's phone was stolen right under our noses by one of the workers on the roof at our apartment. She confronted the rotten kid and went into his pockets where she recovered the phone. Lucky she has balls! In tradition, we went to the Alegre pub to eat a pie where we advised to stay. We were headed to sublime however it was being raided by the police. Here a huge attempt at a drug sting, and all they found was a couple of joints in the pocket of one of our good friends pinky. She was taken to a women's holding facility awaiting trial. What a shit show.
Friday was the first day of work for me and Chanae together. There was no hot water at home so we boiled a pot of water and had a bird bath! Busy day at sublime as we were the only staff on for the day. Thankfully we had a good crew of guests where we made friends who sat at bar chill with us all day. When we knocked off, we joined them on the other side of the bar and drank with them in the evening. We stayed at sublime for the night where band played. Jodie arrived back from California at half midnight. We all got super excited and super wasted. When we came home max and Aaron were there drinking. We stayed up for a while but it was strange circumstance so I toddled off to bed at 5am.
Saturday I woke up and went to brunch with the girls at 1pm at el barrio. Always a great meal and an even better catch up on the two weeks we had apart. We all fell into a deep food coma where it was necessary we all went home for a nap. Such a tough life. I Cooked a delicious salad for myself and the girls, and then went to sublime where a rad funky band was playing. We ditched going to the after party, and came home to make a feast before things took a turn for the worst. Our scitzophrenic, bipolar, husband killing drug addict psychopath neighbour Helen had created a murder scene. The fruit loop had cut her wrists and filled bags of blood and then poured her blood all over the walls and the floors of her room, and the hall, and the bathroom. I called the landlord who then had the police and ambulance arrive and carry the stupid bitch out and roughly clean the place. All we wanted to do was come home and cook mash potato but good old Helen had to fuck shit up. We went to max and Heidi's rooftop and watched over at our apartment until we could go back at 4.30am. Our apartment stunk and blood stains which hadn't been completely cleaned still marked the floors. Despite us having absolutely no emotion over the crazy bitches behaviour or wellbeing, the blood stains and smells were haunting.
We had to be up after hardly any sleep where we would be visiting pinky at Solola, She was in high spirits and told us about her experience on 'the inside' before visiting hours were over and we had to head back to San Pedro for work (but of course not before we ate friend chicken). We Started our flyer shift on aho. We did a round or two before giving up and retiring to the hammocks on the beach. We were having a hilarious time and escalated into full pest mode when we went to kidnap Ferny (again). This time not so successfully as we became the captives in his dungeon Jodie became a wizard. We finished the night at sublime where me and Chanae chilled out, dancing, chatting a fm having a good time and Ye olde jodes fucked shit up! When the three amigas trekked home, we all had a d&m before bed at 5am until we were woken at midday to construction - standard.
That afternoon, Helen came back and we all hid in my room while she cleaned her place out. The stupid cow had been evicted before but this time it was for good. Surprisingly though she obviously hadn't completed her current round of rampage in the Pedge as she moved to the apartments right across from us. And we were scared. An evil, malicious and deadly woman. We locked our doors and had our landlord reassure us that we would be safe and if she came back the police would be called right away. On the way to sublime to cook brownies, we got a burger from Andy, and chilled the day away. In the evening I cooked up a three course meal con vino Tinto and we ate brownies for dessert and fell asleep watching a movie.
The Next day I woke up and pottered around the apartment, transferring photos to/from electronic devices and face timing loved ones. I cooked up another feast for me and Chanae while Jodie and paco went to Solola where Pinky got released. The next day and me and Chanae were the day crew, we knocked off at six and then went home and hung out with pinky <3 it was back to sublime and close call with police lurking around, trying to catch pinky breaking curfew. There was a small afterparty for Pinkys release but by the time we got there it was all broken up so we went back home to my room for a room party until 3am.
Luis was arriving Thursday afternoon and we were so excited to be reunited. We had the Alegre pub pie and went to sublime for a wobbly night. It was a Killer funk set by fernylicious who Absolutely killed it on the decks. Everyone was having an incredible night dancing up a storm until the music stopped suddenly, so we presumed the police must have shut us down.... Nope, way to early for that.... Turns out Ferny pulled the plug on himself and went for a little nap on the deck! Me and Chanae carried him home and set him up a bucket before taking obligatory novelty photos and then had an after
PArty back at our place.
Friday would be our last day in San Pedro and paco cooked us breakfast. I Pottered around and packed before we went to sublime for our last night. We had a M night and the band played until the Music stopped before closing time due to cops. Douche cops ruining the closing time song tradition, especially on our last night! We sat around the bar after close and Smoked a cigar which I had been holding onto for a special occasion since Cuba. We then had a sweet crew for an after party at our place. Jonny passed out and we put everything possible on top of him and took an abundance of photos. Max raised the bar by shaving off half an eyebrow and me and Chanae nearly wet ourselves in Laughter.... In fact, I'm pretty sure a little wee came out. Around 6am and Max and I watched the sunrise over the lake before I hightailed to bed for a couple hours of sleep. In the morning we scooted around town trying to book a shuttle which we had truly left until the very last minute. Luckily enough, half a dozen of our friends decided to join us on our journey out of San Pedro and to Antigua. It was Alessi's birthday and he was having a party at "the pool" in Antigua so what a better way to transition our way from San Pedro. We created the best shuttle in our history, filled with friends and lots of treats.
K and aho, Jodie removed the fly screen from the window where we smoked cigarettes and joints in the shuttle while coming up with so much banter involving the mit. That's when it got a life of its own. Tripping off the bus, we checked into hostel and met up with our friends upstairs at the bar. We headed to to pool party for allessi's birthday with super high vibes. An empty pool with dj set up, speaks and a bar surrounded by a grass field and views of volcanoes. Just epic. We Partied all night in reunion with our city friends again. I was even so lucky enough to watch a volcano erupt and spurt lava while walking out to the car through the night with Andrea and Manuel <3 We didn't leave the party until 10.30am the next morning. The girls went to the hostel and passed out while i had a shower and met the boys at Zoola and started drinking again. From there we filled a car, pumping psych trance with people hanging off the outside of the car and luis sitting On the bonnet and cruised the streets to cafe no Se. We were running a riot. We then went to lucky rabbit which is where Jodie and Chanae met up with us.
We partied all night there and then went to another bar after hours, where we got kidnapped by Jose and went to his incredible home where we met all of his gorgeous dogs and puppies. We Cuddled on couch before falling asleep (somehow) with psych trance blaring at 3am. Awake at 10am and we regrouped with everyone in the kitchen where we ate the best soup I've ever had for breakfast! We lazed around watching tv until 4pm. We went back to the hostel and booked our shuttle for 4am the next morning. We caught back up with the boys and did another bar crawl before ending up at lucky rabbit. It was a weird night and the girls were in foul moods and couldn't stand anyone. After lucky rabbit we went to another bar where we danced on tables and partied the night away pretending we didn't have to leave. We kidnapped a few people from the bar and all went back to Jose's place.
I joked to the boys about kidnapping them and bring them to utila with us. As we continued to party at Jose's, our alarms starting ringing which meant we had to leave to catch our shuttle....The boys told us to miss out shuttle and they would come with us, and we would do a family road trip to Utila! After cross examining them to see if this was a legit proposal, we agreed that if we miss our shuttle we would road trip together (even though I still felt sceptical that this would legitimately happen). Surprisingly and epically, it happened! So now we aren't sure with who kidnapped who, but the important thing is that we were all in this together! The events following, would also just so happen to be our biggest and best adventure to date.....
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